


Beautiful Dirty Rich

by 3cheers12years



Category: Avenged Sevenfold
Genre: F/M, Foster Care, Gen, Mild Gore, Mild Language, Thank you ayesha for beta-ing, i want to continue and add more but we shall see, teen
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-12-26
Updated: 2017-01-26
Packaged: 2018-05-09 10:09:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 12
Words: 18,444
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5535950
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/3cheers12years/pseuds/3cheers12years
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Brian Haner has grown to hate Christmas."</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. 1. Xmas Sux

Brian Haner has grown to hate Christmas.

  
His life hasn't been easy, and he believes it all revolves around the 25th of December. His birth was a young adult accident, and his father had left him before he was even born. He spent his first ever Christmas in a homeless shelter. The first Christmas he remembers is the first flat his mother could afford, the ripe old age of 5 years. His only present was a 50 cent bar of chocolate.

  
On the year of his 10th birthday, his father came back. He came with a job and made his mother happy. He brought home the bacon, and brought back the trust. Brian thought that this year, Christmas would be different. That it would be happy. But alas, he was wrong.

Brian doesn't remember the argument that his parents had. All he remembers is peering around the kitchen door, watching them yell and scream and throw things. He watched his father pick up the carving knife, a silent scream leaving his mouth as his father lunged forward, piercing his mother through the stomach.

All of the colour left her face. Her face stunned as she looks between the face of her partner and the handle of the carving knife. Her knees buckled and she slid to the floor. Brian's father was still holding the handle of the knife, and it slipped out at a horrid angle that made Brian's mother gasp and choke on her tears and possibly her own blood.

Brian quietly ran.

He ran out of the door, closing it ever so softly behind him and to next door, to the middle aged woman with the pretty cats and ugly curtains. He explained everything to her in a jumble and begs for her to call the police.

She did.

Brian is made to give a witness report. A 10 year old boy having to describe his mother's death. His father is taken in handcuffs, leaving poor Brian nowhere to stay.

His mother and father had no siblings. The one grandparent who was still alive was incapable of caring for the child, so he was put into care. He almost missed his mothers funeral with the fiasco of trying to find him a suitable foster home.

The day before the first court hearing regarding the murder of his mother, Brian had heard of his father's death. He had overdosed himself to get out of the charges. His foster family at the time had insisted that he go to the funeral, as 'he is still your father, Brian.' They had expected him to pay his respects, throw the dirt onto the casket along with all the hatred. Instead, Brian held tight to the hatred and pissed on the casket, much to the vicar and the foster family's distaste. They had refused to keep Brian in their household after such a rebellious act. And that is when things went so far into rock bottom that Brian was now digging for oil.

He ended up with an upstate family in the end. They couldn't conceive, and they wanted a child. But they didn't want a child for the same reasons other people did. They wanted a child to seem like the perfect family. They were kind that lied about Brian's behaviour and paid him in expensive gifts and thousand dollar checks to keep up with these lies.

  
They sent him off to a private school, and every Christmas they'd buy him whatever the fuck he asked for and pay him to sit at the table at Christmas lunch. However, when Brian turned 17, they went on a cruise.

They decided to go on a year long cruise, leaving him in charge of himself. By this time, social services had stopped check ups. They'd given him enough bank money to pay for food. If he wanted more, he'd email them and they'd transfer. They had, however, arranged for Brian to spend Christmas with their rich friends, the Evans.

  
Brian hated the Evans'. He hated the Evans', he hated Christmas, he hated the people he lived with and he hated the fact that he had absolutely no way out of it.

On Christmas Day at 12pm, Brian sat on a plush leather couch, holding a glass of coke between his hands after being chauffeured to the Evans household. He was surprised to find out that Mrs. Evans had made dinner herself, and that Mr. Evans and his daughter was assisting. That was until they were shooed out of the kitchen by Mrs. Evans yelling 'Out, out! You're spoiling my soup!'

With a grin on his face and an extremely ugly Christmas jumper, Mr. Evans walked into the living room, followed by his daughter. Brian glances up briefly, keeping the same stony expression secure, before returning to staring into his glass of coke.

Mr. Evans sits on an armchair, sighing as he does. His daughter awkwardly sits on the same couch as Brian, on the very end.

"So Brian," Mr Evans starts, tapping his hand on the arm of the chair closest to Brian, making the teenager look up slowly, "How's your Christmas been so far?"

"Shit." Brian replies bluntly.

Mr. Evans' face falters slightly, "Oh? Oh. What was your best Christmas?"

"I haven't had a best Christmas. They've all been shit."

Mr. Evans' daughter sniggers slightly, and Brian glances to her quickly. He recognises her from school.

"They can't have all been shit, Brian! You must've had a good Christmas one year."

Brian shakes his head. Mr. Evans grins and leans forward, "C'mon, boy, tell me about a Christmas!"

Brian looks up at Mr. Evans slowly, making direct eye contact. His words are calm, collected and yet firm, "When I was 10 years old, I watched my mother get murdered on December 25th by my father. I watched the life leave her eyes."

Mr. Evans swallows hard before opening his mouth to speak, which is pointless as Brian immediately cuts him off.

"Up until I was 5 years old I spent every Christmas in a homeless shelter. From then on I never had a Christmas dinner or any presents, 'cause all of our money went on paying the bills. The year I had a Christmas dinner was the year my mother died. I have not, and I repeat Sir, _not_ , had a fucking nice Christmas."

Brian watches as Mr. Evans faulters to find a response. He calmly sips at his coke.

Mr.Evans clears his throat and stands, "I'm going to-... make cranberry sauce," he stammers, as he quickly exits the room.

Brian scrunches his nose up and returns to staring at his coke. There's a few moments where all he can hear is the ticking of the clock and the fizzing of his coke before there is a shuffle and he feels the weight on the couch move closer to him.

The Evans' daughter speaks, her voice timid, "You-... You go to Worthingtons, right?"

Brian glances up, meeting the girls eyes. He's surprised by the colour, they're a shiny kind of brown, almost the same colour as his glass of coke. He didn't expect them to be brown, considering the bright red of her hair and the soft porcelain of her skin. He nods slowly.

"Yeah. It's full of capitalist pigs."

She huffs out a laugh, "Tell me about it. I'm in the same grade as you, right? I mean, I think I am... I think you're in my Latin class."

Not only is he surprised by her eyes, but he's surprised by her attitude, "I-.. yeah, I think so, yeah."

"I'm Rosalind. But you can call me Roz, or Rose or-... or Rosalind.."

Brian's lips tweak a small smile, "I know. You sit in the front, by Claire and Jackson."

She nods eagerly, "I do!", her eyes drop from his slightly and her voice changes, "I'm really like-... I'm really sorry about your mom.."

Brian furrows his brow, "Please don't be. I don't like sympathy."

She cocks her head, "Then why do you do that thing you just did?"

Brian quietly sips at his drink and avoids the question. The sound of the fizzing and the clock returns to his ear drums.

Rosalind plays with her hair, "I've heard you play guitar. You're really good."

He murmurs a thanks and goes back to watching the bubbles fizzle to the surface. Rosalind shifts closer again, and Brian looks up at her.

She smiles when he makes eye contact, the brown of her eyes bubbling with happiness the same way his coke does. "Like, really good. My dad plays guitar. Mostly classical, but he has an electric somewhere. Its an Ibanez or something. I used to play piano, but then Dad got me a horse so I concentrated on that. I still play sometimes but I like to compete more."

"You have a horse?" Brian asks. He's not sure if he's legitimately interested or not.

"Yeah. She's an Arabian. Her name is Jessie."

"I don't know anything about horses."

"Maybe I can get you to meet her."

"Maybe."

Brian tries to drop the conversation, but Rosalind is determined to make him talk.

"My friends say you're a rebel, y'know,"

"Oh?"

"Yeah. They say you're a bad boy, like, you don't care what people think of you or what the teachers say and you're like-... 'fuck the authority', y'know?

There's this rumor that you broke into one of the teachers house and smashed up their greenhouse in the middle of the night and the police were called and you ran from them and flipped them off as you did. I thought it was ridiculous but after the way you talked to my dad maybe its true. I don't know. Is it true?"

Brian blinks and stares at Rosalind for a moment. She talks fast and he can't process what she says as fast as she says it.

"I-.. yeah, I did that. The police were called the next morning, though. I saw them when I was cycling to school." Brian eventually replies.  
Rosalind turns to face him fully, "Did you flip them off then?"

Brian laughs slightly, "No. I didn't flip them off then."

Rosalind smiles wide, "You should have! I would have if I were you, I'd have flipped them off and yelled, 'fascist, racist pigs! Fuck you all! You're all bags of-... bags of poop!', and just cycled off into the sunset with my middle finger in the air."

Brian laughs. Like, properly laughs. He feels like he hasn't done that in _years_. He's decided that he likes Rosalind. He likes her hair, her eyes, her skin, her smile and her lips, he likes her voice and her laugh and her soft lisp. He likes her attitude. He decides that Rosalind is the nice Evans.

"Would you do that if you had done it?" Brian asks, settling into the sofa.

She grins and raises a perfectly arched eyebrow, "Ah, Brian, that is where we differ. I would not have done such a thing in the first place." Brian laughs and sips at his coke.

"That's-... that's fair."

A silence settles between them. However, it doesn't settle for long.

Rosalind gasps, "Brian, have you met the dogs?"

Brian shakes his head, "You have dogs?"

She jumps up from the chair, taking his glass of coke and placing it on a coaster before grabbing his hand, "yes! We have a beagle and a bloodhound. The beagle is a bitch, her name is Poppy, and the bloodhound is a dog called Oscar. They're both lovely, Oscar looks scary but he's a softy really. He just likes tummy rubs."

She drags him through a formal living room and two hallways and a tiny flight of steps, "This is the dogs bedroom," she states with her fingers on the handle, "Well, its not really their bedroom. Its just got toys and their crates in it for when we have guests and we don't want the dogs to like-... be in the way."

Brian nods slightly, his eyebrow permanently raised and an amused on his face. Rosalind spins around and pauses, "You look cute when you smile. Anyway, Poppy jumps up and I think she's gonna be about testicle height on you so like... beware."

Brian laughs as she opens the door and drags him into the room. She quickly shuts it behind him before dropping to the floor to lie on her back with a yell of "My baaaaabies!", letting the dogs rush over to her, licking her face and wagging their tails excitedly. She squeals and wiggles her toes in her socks as their breathing tickles at their face. Brian smiles at the sight.

Poppy is the first to investigate Brian's presence. Once she's noticed him, she bounds over, jumping up to say hello as Rosalind had predicted.

He fusses her quietly, watching as her eyes close as he massages her ears, tail wagging lazily. Rosalind sits up and smiles at him, "If my dogs like you, you're a good egg. I think they're like Willy Wonka's golden egg tester thingy."

"The what?"

"Y'know when Veruca Salt was singing? The scene where she throws a fit and is like 'I want it now!', and falls down the thing and it turns out she's a bad egg."  
Brian blinks at her and Rosalind laughs.

"Do you know what I mean?"

"No?"

"Have you ever seen _Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory?_ "

"You mean _Charlie and the Chocolate Factory_ , with Johnny Depp?"

Rosalind gasps, an offended look on her face. There's a strand of hair falling down between her furrowed brow, "No, with Gene Wilder. I cannot believe, Mr. Haner, that you have not seen the original Chocolate Factory film and I am going to have to force you to come here and watch it with me so I can badly sing along to every song in that musical and bless you with its existence."

Brian sits on the floor, fussing under Oscar's chin, wrinkling his nose when the dog drools on him, "You actually want to spend time with me?"

"Of course," she puts on her best southern belle accent, playfulness dancing in her eyes, "You're but a poor lonely boy,"

"Like... like being a friend?"

Rosalind's face becomes serious again, her fingers picking at a thread in her jeans, "Yeah. Like a friend."

Brian chews his lip and swallows hard. He's thinking overtime. He hasn't had a friend before. He has people who buy him cigarettes, alcohol and provide him with pot every now and again, but he wouldn't call them friends.

Rosalind scoots closer, her voice softening, "I want to be your friend, Brian. Do you want to be my friend?"

Brian avoids looking at her and decides to concentrate on the over-sized baby of a bloodhound who is begging for tummy rubs, "That'd be nice."

Rosalind jumps up, "Then consider this the start of a friendship, Brian! Now c'mon, I can smell turkey and I'm absolutely _starving_!"

She drags him up and out with her, closing the door behind her, waving to her pets as she does so, cooing a "bye doggies, play nice," before dragging Brian back into the room they were sat in, poking her head through the kitchen door and asking if she can soup up.

Brian doesn't know how to feel. He has just started a friendship in the most formal manner imaginable. It was a literal friend request, and he is completely baffled.

He likes Rosalind. He really does. Every time he looks at her, he thinks of a Waterboys song with her name in the title. He really wonders if she'll marry the wrong guy.

He likes her because she's different. She is nothing like the other students that he's tried to befriend. She's a little bit eccentric, super cute and bubbly and Brian feels like he could either be bad for her or she could be good for him.

She sits next to Brian at the dinner table and forces him to bring out his personality. She pulls crackers with him and makes him wear the paper hat, begs for him to read out a lame joke and teases him about liking Brussels sprouts.

Brian starts to think that this Christmas may not be a good one, but it is certainly _alright_.


	2. 2. He's A Tramp

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Normally, people stay away from Brian, not ask to have a 'onesie party', as she put it, after being forced to hang out at Christmas."

Brian believes that the events of the Christmas dinner were going to be forgotten.

On December 28th, he's lounging on the couch of the informal living room, eating popcorn off a bowl on his chest and watching _Emperor's New Groove_ on the big, fuck off television. He's barely even gotten into the film, wiggling his shoulders to the opening song and singing along to every single lyric when the house phone rings.

It makes him jump, nearly spilling the popcorn and he scrambles to sit up and peer over at the caller ID. He raises an eyebrow as he reads the name "Joseph Evans" and the house number beneath it. He turns down the TV slightly and answers it wearily.

"Hello, Anderson household, can I help?" He says, his voice changing immediately as he answers the phone.

"Hi, Brian? Its Rosalind,"

His voice changes back, "Oh, shit, hey! How're you?"

"I'm not too bad, thanks," She laughs quietly, "I like your telephone voice."

Brian lies back down and gets himself comfortable on the couch again, smiling slightly, "Thank you, I think?"

"You're welcome. But that's not what I called for, I was just wondering if your parents-.. or-.. guardians rather, are still on their cruise?"

Brian nods slowly and throws another handful of popcorn into his mouth as he answers, "Yeah. They're not back until like-... January 3rd. I think."

"So you must be kinda lonely then, right?" she asks. He finds that her lisp is slightly more prominent over the phone.

"Yeah, I suppose,"

"Then would you like to come down here or hang out somewhere, Brian?"

Brian hesitates, "Um, well, if I'm honest with you Rosalind, I'm lounging around in my onesie watching films..."

Rosalind gasps, "Can I join you?"

Brian laughs, "Pardon?"

"Can I join you? I can come down in my onesie and I'll bring snacks and everything!" she squeals excitedly. Brian grins.

"Yeah, sure. Sounds great. I just started _Emperor's New Groove_ -"

Rosalind laughs, "A tough guy like you watching Disney films? Cute,"

"It's a good fuckin' film, Rosalind!" Brian defends himself, making her laugh even harder.

"It's okay, it's one of my faves. Pause it, I won't be long. Bye, Brian!"

Brian smiles as he says his goodbye, hangs up, and pauses the film as he was told. He decides to quickly go wash his face, brush his teeth and mess with his hair until he thinks he looks charmingly disgraceful.

It didn't take as long for Rosalind to arrive as he'd expected, the doorbell loudly screaming at him, making him quickly dash for the door, sliding to a halt due to his socks on a wooden floor as he opens the stained glass door.

She smiles brightly at him, the hood of her onesie up to show off the cute little Stitch face. She has a tote bag on her shoulder, full of what Brian assumes is snacks and blue converse to match the colour of her onesie.

Brian smiles back, "Hello, Experiment 626,"

She giggles and puts her best Stitch impersonation, her voice changing to try and match his and eyes squinting as he raises her hand to wave and says "Haaaai."

He laughs and steps aside, "I like it. It's cute."

She walks in and glances around the entrance room, putting her hood down as she does. Her hair is in a messy bun on the top of her head, and all of the light seems to catch all of the right shades of ginger. She turns to Brian again.

"What's yours?" she asks as he closes the door.

"Sorry?"

"Your onesie, silly! Show me your onesie! We can't have a onesie party if I haven't properly seen it, now can we?"

Brian laughs and does a twirl, "Italian Stallion. S'like Rocky's robe, y'know?"

Rosalind nods, "Are you Italian?"

He shakes his head, "No. It's just a fuckin' good film,"

She grins and slides her shoes off, "That's fair. So, show me the way?"

He takes her bag from her and starts sliding his way across the floor back into the living room, making her laugh and slide after him. He carefully places the bag down beside the chair, and offers her a drink.

She plops herself down on the sofa and glances up at him, "That'd be nice, what do you have?"

Brian lists all of the drinks that are available, and Rosalind raises her eyebrow.

"You're seriously offering me alcohol at like, 1pm?" she asks

Brian laughs and shrugs, "Sure, why not? If you want a soft drink you can have one. Save the alcohol for what you deem a more appropriate time."

She grins, "Coke would be just fine, thank you."

He gets her a pint of coke before slumping down on the sofa again, sitting on his feet and pressing play on the film.

"Help yourself to snacks. They're basically all over the coffee table,"

Rosalind grins, picking up a bowl of Doritos to have to herself, "don't mind if I do."

Brian laughs, quickly stealing one before picking up a packet of strawberry laces.

"We should totally watch _Lady and the Tramp_ after this." Rosalind says. Brian raises an eyebrow. "Your candy reminded me of the spaghetti scene."

He nods, eyes smiling as he jokingly offers her the end of the one that he is currently chewing on. Her eyes turn to look slightly mischievous as she takes the end and slowly starts nibbling her way up it.

Brian practically shits himself. He quickly takes a final bite of his strand of candy, letting it fall from his lips and Rosalind laughs.

"Pussy," she sings, nudging him with his elbow and continuing to eat her stolen strawberry lace.

Brian just stares at her. He's just met this girl and yet she talks to him and jokes around with him as if she's known him for years.

"You really confuse me, y'know." Brian says.

Rosalind just smiles at him and replies with a simple, "good."

Brian enjoys Rosalind's company. He enjoys that she'll occasionally quote the film and feed him Doritos. He likes the short laugh she'll give after hearing a line, and he adores the way she snort-laughs at the " _Yay, I'm a llama again!_ " line, and giggles that its her favourite.

He finds it strange how comfortable she is in his presence. Normally, people stay away from Brian, not ask to have a 'onesie party', as she put it, after being forced to hang out at Christmas.

When the film finishes she stares at Brian. He glances at her and raises an eyebrow, "Can I help?"

"Next."

"Pardon?"

She smiles, "Next film, you silly banana."

He reaches for the remote, "Still want _Lady and the Tramp?_ "

She nods eagerly, "Yes please. I'd also like a mini loo break."

He laughs and points through to the toilet, "Just through there. First door, its a little two-piece."

"Thank you, kind sir," she says as she stands and slides her way across the wooden floor. Brian watches as she goes, waiting to hear the click of the door before continuing to hunt for the film. He finds it, standing and picking up the glasses and dancing his way to the kitchen to refill the drinks.

Brian nearly shits himself, jumping violently and spilling coke all over the kitchen counter when Rosalind sneaks her way into the kitchen and loudly sings, " _He's a tramp!_ "

Brian scrambles to right the bottle of coke, swearing as he rushes to clean it from dripping down the sides. Rosalind laughs and does nothing to help, simply running her hands over Brian's shoulders and down his back as she continues to sing, "But they love him!"

"Oh my God, Roz, help me here woman!" Brian exclaims, trying to give her a handful of kitchen towels. She ignores him, throwing herself into a dance across the kitchen, putting her years of ballet to the test.

" _Breaks a new heart, eeeevery day_ ," Brian glares as he cleans, meeting her playful eyes, " _He's a tramp, they adore him and I only hope he'll stay that way!"_

Brian smirks and throw a Coke-soaked paper towel at her, making her squeal and jump out of the way.

She puts her hands on her hips, "How rude of you, Brian."

He smiles, "Stop singing Peggy fuckin' Lee and help me,"

She picks up the soggy paper towel and throws it away before helping him mop up the mess, "Spoil sport."

"You made me make this mess."

"I did not!"

"You did too,"

"Did not,"

"Did too,"

"Not,"

"You made me jump."

She laughs, "are animated singing dogs terrifying to a big strong boy like you, Brian?"

He pushes her gently, "Fuck off, you bust in here singing 'he's a tramp!' like a strangled old cat and you expect me to not react?"

She throws away the paper towels and leaves Brian fill up the coke. She watches him idly as he does so, taking her glass and prancing her way back into the living room. Brian thinks she's nuts.

They settle down and turn on the film, and Rosalind whispers how this one is her favourite film in the history of all films.

Brian unzips his onesie half way through the film and Rosalind raises her eyebrow.

"Getting naked, are you?" she jokes. Brian pulls the onesie apart.

"I have a shirt on underneath. Keep yo' panties dry."

She laughs before looking at the shirt. "I know that band... Not like, personally. My uncle Tim is like, big into that sorta punk stuff. He likes Rancid. He used to take me to ballet sometimes and on the way there I'd be singing along to Rejected like a right little rebel child."

Brian smiles, "Do you still listen to it?"

She shakes her head, "Not really. Sometimes when the mood strikes but not-... not often."

Brian nods and smiles, "I didn't really expect that from you."

"Looks can be deceiving, Bri."

They continue to get lost in the film, but Brian keeps thinking about how she called him Bri. It sounds silly, but it reminds him of his mother and he also thinks of how nobody has called him 'Bri', since. Nobody has been close enough. Brian shakes the feeling.

They marathon films for hours, watching _The Jungle Book, 101 Dalmatians, The Little Mermaid, The Lion King, Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory, Pirates of the Caribbean_ and a whole tonne more, ordering a pizza around 6pm.

At around 9pm, Rosalind starts to yawn. Brian can see that her eyes are getting tired, and offers if she wants to go home. She states that she wants to see the end of the film, and he smiles.

"I'll text my dad toward the end to send Tobin to get me. I promise. I don't-.. I don't wanna over stay, y'know?" she says, sounding slightly concerned.

Brian shakes his head, "You're welcome to stay as long as you'd like. It's nice having you here, you just-... look sleepy."

It wasn't long after this exchange that Brian noticed Rosalind's head start nodding as she drifted off to sleep, slumping down and resting her head on Brian's shoulder as she snores softly.

He takes a moment to glance over her before pulling a blanket over her. He takes in the way her dark blonde lashes fall against the pale of her cheek and how her cupids bow is almost non-existent. Her lips are round and full and Brian can't deny that shes gorgeous.

He frowns at himself. He's watching this girl _sleep_ for crying out loud. He decides to watch the rest of the film, like he's supposed to, and wakes her about 10 minutes from the end.

She rubs her eyes and sits up slowly, apologising for falling asleep on him. Brian smiles and says that its fine, and she smiles back softly. She thanks him for the blanket and pats around for her phone to send the text, laughing that her eyes are "having trouble remembering how to work" as she tries to focus on her phone.

Brian's kinda sad that she's leaving. He's thoroughly enjoyed having her company. She's a laugh, a bubbly energy to be around and he thinks it makes a nice change.

He stands at the door and waves as she leaves.

She walks backwards and waves back, "Thanks, Bri! I'll text you, yeah?"

He leans on the door frame, "You better!"

She laughs and grins, "Awesome. Keep smiling, buh-bye!"

Brian waits until she's safely in the car before closing the door behind him, locking up for the night and sighing softly to himself.

He unconsciously takes her advice and smiles to himself for the rest of the night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Half of this is unbeta'd so if you spot a mistake, feel free to point it out.
> 
> Title - Beautiful Dirty Rich - Lady Gaga - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7Nr33m1zXVE (thank you Ayesha) 
> 
> Chapter title - He's A Tramp - Lady and the Tramp/Peggy Lee (lyrics also featured in this part) - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IwR4JewmdWU
> 
> Characters belong to themselves, all a work of fiction.


	3. 3. First Date

"Brian Haner, what on Earth do you think you're doing walking straight past me?!"  
Brian turns and smiles, turning on his heel to walk towards Rosalind, his arms open in an invitation for a hug. She holds him around the waist and gives him a tight squeeze before letting go and dragging him by the wrist to her friends.

"I'm introducing you to people." She informs him. 

"You sure you wanna do that? I'm a delinquent." He laughs, following after the feisty redhead.

"I don't care, they're gonna have to live with it because you're my friend and Harriet thinks you're hot and I'm being a total lad and hooking you up." She states, glancing back at him briefly.

She stops abruptly and announces that she has arrived and she has a 'new squad member so y'all better behave', quickly introducing him to everyone, nudging him slightly when she gestures to Harriet. He notices the way she twirls her hair around her finger and juts out a hip. He also notices the way that Rosalind's gaze changes when she looks at Parker, making a mental note to tease her about it on the way home.

Which he does, and gets an even better response than he'd ever imagined.

Rosalind's cheeks immediately burn bright red, her pale skin not at all helping her situation. She loosens her school tie slightly and stammers, "I have no idea what you're talking about."

Brian grins at her, nudging against her slightly, "Are you sure, Roz? Like, y'know, the way you look at him and the way you ugly laugh at his hella bad jokes?"

Rosalind fidgets with her iPhone case, snapping it on and off again, "Nope, no idea."

"What about when you can't stop babbling and accidentally called him hot? Didn't you try to cover it with something like 'Oh, this Californian sun is getting to you, Parker, you're sweating. Not attractive hot, sweaty hot' and claimed that it was a smooth recovery?"

Rosalind stops dead on the sidewalk and stares at Brian, "How do you know about that, Haner?"

"Harriet told me. When a girl likes you, they'll gossip to you about anything, Roz."

She smacks his arm and storms ahead of him, "Go fuck yourself, Brian!"

He runs after her, grabbing her around the waist and hoisting her up, making her squeal and kick her legs, "Admit it, Carrot-top! You've got a crush!"

She yells that she admits it. She doesn't just yell that, though, she also yells that he thinks he's got a cute butt and that his eyebrows are too big but she likes them anyway. It makes Brian have to put her down or else he'd drop her, as he was laughing too much to keep her up.

Rosalind straightens herself up, brushing her school blouse out, readjusting her bag and fixing her hair before folding her arms over her chest and raising an eyebrow at Brian, who is leaning against a wall laughing.

"What?" she snaps.

It makes Brian laugh more, "you look so pissed at me."

"I am! You're gonna tease the hell out of me!" she exclaims.

Brian pushes himself off of the wall and slings an arm around her shoulders, pulling her along to continue walking home, "only if you don't ask him out."

She gazes up at him, "I can't do that."

Brian rolls his eyes, "Why not?"

"It's scary."

"So? Doing things that scare you is good. Builds character."

Rosalind scoffs, "Thanks, Gandhi."

Brian tuts and moves to walk in front of her, walking backwards. Rosalind tells him he's gonna fall but he ignores her.

"What is the worst that could happen if you were like, 'hey Parker, I like your face, lets go get ice cream?', huh?"

"He could say, 'No Rosalind, I'm lactose intolerant and I hate you and I'm gonna tell everyone that!', and then I'd go home and cry and never leave the house until I'm eighteen and then run away to New Zealand with my horse and dogs and start a sheep farm."

Brian stops walking and Rosalind bumps into his chest.

"Rosalind."

"Yeah?"

"What the fuck goes on in your brain?"

"It could happen!"

He shakes his head. He carries on walking and talking, "The worst that could happen is he could say no. The best that could happen is he could say yes and you go on a date. Its fifty-fifty." 

Rosalind pouts her lips, "I guess."

"I'll make a deal with you, yeah?" his voice softens slightly,"I'll ask Harriet out and tell her you're gonna ask Parker, so if it goes well and he agrees to go on a date, it'll be all four of us and I'm not gonna let you make a dick of yourself."

She studies his face and Brian smiles at her reassuringly, "I-...I don't know-"

"Do you want me to like-... straight up tell him to ask you on a date?" He offers. Rosalind shakes her head quickly.

"No, s'embarrassing."

"Then do it."

She sighs, "Brian-"

"No, Roz! C'mon, you're fabulous, weird and its at least worth asking him." Brian whines.

They stop at the large driveway to Rosalinds house. She thinks it over for a moment, "fine."

He hugs her tight, telling her that 'that's his girl!', and picking her up, whirling her around, making her hold onto his shoulders tight and laugh.

 

It's been a couple of weeks, and it is finally the day of Brian and Rosalind's double date. Rosalind is about ready to shit a house, and it's only ten AM. Their date is at one.  
She's forced Brian to come over and help her chose something to wear, what kind of make up to put on, how she should do her hair, what perfume she should wear etc, etc and Brian is highly amused.  
She's running around like a blue arsed fly in her cotton bathrobe, her hair in the magical twisty towel after a shower, fretting about everything. Brian however, is sat on her bed with his date clothes in a bag, giving Poppy tummy scratches, finding the tickle spot that makes her kick her leg.

"Brian!"

His head shoots up and he stares at her. She's rummaging through her closet.

"What is it, woman?" He asks, still fussing the dog idly.

"I can't find anything to wear," she whines.

"Rosalind, you have a walk in wardrobe. I'm sure you have a whole load of stuff to wear." Brian states.

"No but like.... I can't find anything he'd like."

He rolls is eyes and stands up, making his way into Rosalinds wardrobe.

"It doesn't matter that much, Roz. We're going for ice cream."

"But Brian-"

He puts his finger over her lips, "Stop. Just, casual, okay? Still pretty, because you are, but just nice, casual clothing."

Rosalind shoves her hands into the pockets of her robe. Brian smiles and turns his back to her, looking through her collection of clothing.

"Why don't you just have like... this-" he pulls out a mustard coloured slouchy, knitted sweater. He glances at Rosalind, watching how she crinkles her nose, slowly putting it back on the rail, "or, y'know, not."

Rosalind laughs as Brian flicks through her clothes. He pulls a thin black sweater, "Its simple? It'll go with everything?"

"Its low cut."

"Even better!"

She raises her eyebrow and takes the top from him, humming to herself quietly, "skirt or jeans?"

"Did you shave?"

"No."

"Then jeans. You complain about your legs being too warm in tights and I am not dealing with that bullshit today."

She laughs padding her way to her jeans. She gasps, "mom jeans!"

"What jeans?"

"Mom jeans! With Timbs, or-.... or Docs, and that necklace that Grammie got me for my birthday and-and," she squeals and rushes into her room, setting her clothes on the bed, fetching a belt and jewelry, "And smokey eye with just some clear gloss, yeah? Like, feline eye, yeah?"

Brian stares at her. She turns at looks at him, "Brian?"

"I have no idea what you're saying to me."

She laughs and tells him to close the wardrobe door whilst she gets changed. He does as he's told and looks through her shirts, silently wishing that he'd called Poppy in with him so he'd have something more interesting to look at.

She opens the door again when shes fully clothed. Her jeans are stone wash, high waisted and cuffed, the sweater is tucked in. A thin black belt is accentuating her small waist. She grins at him and takes the towel off her head, "How's this?"

"Jesus, Rosalind, you look amazing," Brian states as she does a twirl. He steps out of the wardrobe and looks over her slowly, laughing when he comes to her feet. She's wearing bright green socks with tiny little pugs on them.

She pouts and tells him to stop judging her as she heads to dry her hair. She pauses before she turns the hairdryer on, asking if Brian wants some dry shampoo. He shakes his head and her face drops.

"You're not going out with your hair looking that gross, Brian Haner." She tells him firmly.

"Why not?" He challenges.

She rolls her eyes, "Use my shower, Brian. There's a clean towel on the radiator, don't be so vile. And yes, there are some unisex scents in there before you're Goddamn testosterone level drops."

He laughs and does as he's told, "You're a babe."

"Whatever. Boys are disgusting."

 

They head out on their double date, Rosalind playing with her curled ponytail continuously to make sure it sits right. Her makeup is dark and sultry, making her brown eyes look even more delicious. Brian, despite his shower, still looks homeless. Rosalind calls it scruffy. He calls it charming. He mocks her however, for wearing the same matte black leather Doc Martens as him, telling her that he'll make a delinquent of her yet.

Brian is in ripped black jeans, a plain black crew neck and an over-sized plaid shirt with one sleeve lazily rolled up. He spends most of the afternoon with his hand on Harriet's bare thigh, managing to ruck up her skater skirt slightly to place his hand slightly higher than it maybe belongs. She gave him a cheeky smile and dragged her teeth across her bottom lip. Brian immediately realises that his relationship with Harriet is going to be a very fun ride.

Rosalind, much to Brian's surprise, is doing extremely well at keeping her cool. She only snort laughed once, which was due to Parker choking on the wafer in his ice cream after he inhaled it instead of took a bite out of it. To be fair, Brian had to excuse himself after that moment so that he could legitimately calm down.

Every now and again, Rosalind and Brian would exchange a special, excited glance. He could tell that she was shocked at how well everything was going, and it made him feel good. He liked that moment where he could take an entire sentence from just a second of eye contact with Rose, especially when it was "look at her eyes, not her tits, Haner". He could even hear her say it in his mind.  
The couples went their separate ways. Brian got invited back to Harriet's, so they could 'get to know each other', whereas Parker and Rosalind went for a walk along the shoreline, so they could legitimately get to know each other.

At around eight PM, Brian received an absolute novel gushing about how amazing Rosalind believes today was and how happy she is, and how she thinks that her and Parker have something special via text. She continues sending back chapter after chapter to Brian's quick yet genuine replies until she's finished explaining the parts that Brian wasn't present for. She finally asks how Brian's 'after date date' went, to which he replied:

"It went well. Lovely girl, puts out, knows what shes doing. 10/10 would bang again."

Which, of course, earned him a stern feminist lecture from Rosalind, who had decided to ring him and tell him personally that 'women are not to be spoken about like that', even after he's told her that he's only kidding.

To be honest, he wouldn't want her to treat him any other way.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Title - Beautiful Dirty Rich - Lady Gaga - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7Nr33m1zXVE (thank you Ayesha)
> 
> Chapter title - First Date - Blink182 - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vVy9Lgpg1m8
> 
> Characters belong to themselves, all a work of fiction.


	4. 4. She's My Best Friend

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Harriet thinks it's weird, and that Brian should 'investigate further' and ask Roz some 'things you only tell your bestie questions'."

Rosalind and Brian haven't seen each other properly in about a month.

They've seen each other in school and text back and forth, but they haven't had "bestie time", as Rosalind calls it, in awhile. They've both been busy having new relationships. So Rosalind takes matters into her own hands and demands that Brian stays down one weekend so that they can sit, chat, catch up and goof about.

Rosalind likes when Brian stays down, as she gets to make him over. She does his makeup, his hair and his nails, and to be quite honest, Brian kinda likes it. He likes that she gets all excited whenever he lets her do these things, how chill it is with them sat listening to music with face masks and candles and Rosalind very carefully and precisely doing his nails.

Brian is laid down on Rosalind's bed with his hand in her lap. She's shaped his nails and put a top coat on and is getting excited about the deep plum colour she's about to plaster all over his nails. He smiles up at her and she grins back before returning her attention back to his hand.

"Can I do your toes later?" she asks as she paints his nails. She glances up briefly to catch the amused look on Brian's face, "What?"

"You wanna paint my toenails?" He asks, grinning.

"Yeah. Is that a problem? Like-... Yeah, if I do I'm gonna have to shave those hairy-ass toe beans of yours but I still wanna paint them. I could do a pattern and everything."

Brian laughs, "Sure. Paint pretty patterns and shave my 'hairy-ass toe beans', Rose. Whatever makes you happy."

"I'm sure Harriet will love it."

"What, my pretty patterns or hairless toes?"

Rosalind laughs, "You're so fucking lame, Bri, do you know that?"

Brian raises an eyebrow. He can feel the face mask crack as he does so, "lame?"

"Yeah. Not like, horse lame, but like... lame lame."

"Horse lame?"

Rosalind looks up and grins. Brian blinks back at her, patiently waiting for an explanation. She laughs at him, putting the cap back on the nail varnish and reaching for another.

"Yeah. When a horse is lame, it basically means they have a bad leg or foot and they can't work. And that reminded me, I'm supposed to ride tomorrow, I hope you don't mind. You haven't met Jessie yet, right? She's lovely. Very people friendly, I'm sure she'll love smelling you for treats and using you as a napkin to wipe her food on that's all stuck to her whiskers."

Brian looks at his nails idly, "as long as I don't chip these I'm totally fine with all that."

Rosalind bursts out laughing, making Brian jump slightly, "what?"

"Do you really care about your nail polish that much?" she laughs.

Brian nods sheepishly, "You've gone to a lot of effort. And they're sparkly!"

Rosalind snort laughs at him, making herself laugh even harder, tears forming in her eyes. Brian uses his non manicured hand to push her shoulder, making her topple over and laugh into her duvet. He's missed spending time with her like this.

He spends the next day following Rosalind around her stables. He didn't expect it to be on site, and he was surprised by the amount of land that the Evans' own. The dogs are trotting along at their feet and Brian's eyes are everywhere. He's looking at everything and not really listening to what Rosalind is waffling on about.

His eyes eventually find themselves back on the redhead in front of him, and he suddenly seems to zoom in on Rosalind's butt. His eyebrows shoot up and he has to make himself look away quickly. He feels kinda bad for it, but also not, because he has just discovered that breeches do wonders for a girls figure.

They step into the barn, there's three stables, only two of which are occupied. The aisle however looks light and airy and is extremely well kept. Brian likes the smell of the hay and the sound of the continuous munching, and the quiet thud of hooves against rubber matting as they move around.

Rosalind instantly puts on her baby voice as she approaches, what Brian assumes, is Jessie's stable. Picking up a rope, she lets herself in and clips the horse to it, telling Brian to move out of the way as she leads her out to tie her in the aisle.

"Brian, meet Jessie. She's an Arabian mare, she's extremely friendly and she won't bite or kick, but she might push you around a bit. She's nudgey. I've gotta muck out so you make friends." She says all of this as she ties up the horse and heads out of the barn. Brian is just left to stand there, clueless.

The horse looks at him and he looks at the horse. She reaches her head out and flares her nostrils, trying to smell him. Brian glances around him. Jessie sighs heavily and looks longingly towards the door that Rosalind exited out of. Brian finds comfort in the fact it seems like the horse is finding this encounter incredibly awkward.

He looks over the mare. He has to admit that she's a beautiful looking creature. She's black and sleek, deep brown dapples over her back. Her eyes are as dark as her coat, and he notices what would be her eyebrows move when she looks around, giving her many different expressions.

Rosalind returns with a wheelbarrow and a pitchfork, tutting at Brian as she puts it down and folds her arms across her chest.

"Why haven't you made friends?" She asks, her tone of voice firm.

Both Jessie and Brian stare at her guiltily. Jessie shifts her back end around and gently nickers. Brian just stands there awkwardly, not knowing what to do with his hands. She raises her eyebrow at him and Brian cracks.

"I've never been around horses, I don't know how!" He whines.

Rosalind grins, picking up the wheelbarrow and parking it in the doorway of the stable. She steps around it and leads Brian by the hand towards Jessie. The mare huffs and reaches her nose out to him again. Rosalind holds his hand out to her, positioning his fingers flat.

"Keep your hand flat n' let her sniff it," she tells him, and he does as he's told. He laughs quietly as her whiskers tickle over his palm and the soft velvet of her muzzle searches for treats.

"See? She's not scary." Rosalind says, smiling at Brian.

He nods, "she's sweet. Her whiskers are tickley."

She laughs, "pet her."

"How?"

"With your fuckin' hand, Brian."

Brian's cheeks flush red. Rosalind steps forward again, "look its not hard. You just," she strokes her hand down the dished face of her mare, moving to pat her neck and scratch at her shoulder. Brian carefully strokes her muzzle, making her lip twitch. Rosalind grins at him, calling him a good boy before heading back to the stable, switching the radio on as she goes.

Rosalind dances around as she mucks out, singing along to the radio, using the top of her pitchfork as a microphone. Brian watches her with a smile, petting Jessie idly.

"Your mother is insane, y'know," he tells the mare quietly.

Rosalind whips her head around and points at him as she dramatically sings to N-Dubz. He shakes his head at her.

"What's this shit?" Brian complains.

"The radio. Ever heard of it?" says Rosalind, her eyes smiling at him even though her tone is judging.

"No but like... this song?"

"Its a fuckin' tune, Brian. An absolute jam."

"Can you find something else?"

"No. If you grab my dock from the tack room we can plug my iPod in?"

Brian does as he's told. Quickly. He practically sprints there and back, plugging everything in quickly and immediately sifting through Rosalind's songs. It makes her laugh.

"You have Joy Division and the Grease Soundtrack?" Brian laughs.

"Remember when you sang every single word to every single song in Hercules? Yeah, same. Good times."

Brian scowls at her. Rosalind snorts.

Brian gasps loudly, and with one urgent tap to the screen, Duran Duran's 'Hungry Like The Wolf' is erupting from the speakers and Brian instantly busting into dance. Rosalind stops and laughs at him as he sings along. She uses the handle of her pitchfork as a microphone.

Rosalind is completely shocked at the fact that Brian knows every single lyric flawlessly and that he's dancing as if he's drunk. She loves it. She especially loves that he starts serenading her horse, laughing as she huffs in his face and tries to nibble at his hair.

Brian enjoys his time in the barn with Rosalind. He likes watching the mannerisms of her mare. It took him a while to peer over the stable next door.

"Who's this?"

"The Wombats." Rosalind replies absently.

Brian laughs, "Not the band, Rosalind. The horse."

She looks up and peeps over, laughing at herself. "Shit, sorry. That's Garlic. He's my dad's old horse. I learnt to ride on him, he's very safe. I'm gonna force you to get on him one day."

Brian looks at Rosalind, blinking at her, "Garlic?"

"Yeah. Garlic."

"...You're joking?"

"No. He's Garlic."

Brian turns back, holding his hand out to the gelding, letting him sniff his hand and waiting for him to step closer to pet him, "Your dad rides?"

"Uh-huh. He used to compete. He's a really good rider, but he had to give it up when he got promoted and when I was born 'cause he just didn't have the time. He didn't have the heart to give him up, though. He's the only horse he kept. Garlic used to do a lot of cross country, you can put him over any jump and he will make sure his rider is safe.... He's lovely."

Brian hums and nods, scratching the thick neck of the horse. He crinkles his nose when he steps away and his hand is covered in dirt and tiny ginger hairs.

He watches quietly as Rosalind grooms, tacks up, mounts up and rides her forwards. He leans against the fence texting as she does her thing.

"Parker's text me," He states, "asking if I'm out drinking tonight."

Rosalind frowns slightly as she trots past, "I thought he was out of state this weekend?"

Brian shrugs, looking up and shielding his eyes from the sun, "Apparently not. He's going out with Ava, Harriet, Jonathan and a few others."

"He told me that he was visiting family in Utah all weekend." she yells from across the arena. Brian frowns slightly, watching the way that Jessie moves. He can see her shoulder muscles move under the silky black of her coat. He returns to his phone.

"Are you going?" Rosalind asks, as she circles past him. Brian shakes his head.

"Nah. Ava's a bitch,"

Rosalind laughs as she pushes her mare into canter, yelling a 'wheee!', as she throws a buck into the transition. Brian can't help but laugh at her. He's decided he's gonna watch Rosalind ride more often.

Brian thinks about the text whilst he waits for Rosalind to finish her ride. He's sat on the floor texting Harriet about it. Harriet thinks it's weird, and that Brian should 'investigate further' and ask Roz some 'things you only tell your bestie questions'.

So Brian does as he's told, once they've made their way back to the house.

Brian sits on the edge of the pool, his feet dangling in the cool chlorinated water whilst Rosalind floats around casually on a pool lounger. She's in a bikini and sunglasses, her hair tied up in a high ponytail.

"Rose?"

"Bri?"

Brian smiles slightly, "I gotta ask you a thing."

Her eyebrow raises from behind her Ray-Bans, "Sounds... ominous."

"How're things with you and Parker?" He asks. Her eyebrow disappears behind the black rims and the bit between them creases, "I'm only asking 'cause you said that he told you he was away and, well, clearly he isn't."

Rosalind slips off the lounger into the water, swimming towards Brian and hoisting herself out of the water to sit beside him.

"It's okay, Brian. Honestly." She says, nudging their bare shoulders together before perching her sunglasses on top of her head.

He shakes his head, "It's not,"

Rosalind studies his face for a moment, "He's been weird. All he wants is sex, he's acting like a fuck-boy and he hasn't been the same guy I was friends with, y'know? He's all pushy and needy when we're alone but if there's someone else or like-.... like we're texting, it's like I don't exist."

Brian frowns, "Sounds dickish,"

"It really is,"

He chews his lip and thinks to himself quietly. Rosalind's eyes don't leave his face, waiting for him to speak.

"He just wants sex, you said?"

She nods.

"Have you let him have that?"

She shakes her head, "No,"

"At all?"

Rosalind averts her eyes. Brian bumps shoulders with her, "Roz?"

"I-... no..." she says quietly, picking at her nail varnish. He realises they have the same colour on their nails.

"You haven't-..." Brian pauses, searching for the right word. He puts on his 'gentleman' voice, " _fornicated_ , at all?"

Rosalind shakes her head slowly. Her body language has changed. Shes hunched over and leaning away from Brian slightly, eyes trained on her hands and her feet have stopped quietly splashing at the water.

"You know that it's okay for you to have not done anything, right?" Brian says, softly.

"It's not alright, Brian," she replies. He opens his mouth to speak but she interrupts him, "I'm like a prude. It's stupid. Like yes, okay, I'm feeling all of those _magical feelings in my nether regions_ but I just can't let it happen. It's not like-... ugh."

"Rosalind, it is perfectly fine to not-"

"You fucked on the first date!" she snaps.

He furrows his brow, "So? Who cares? It doesn't matter, Rose. Trust me. You do it when you're comfortable. Me and Harriet, we're comfortable-"

"On the first date." Rosalind interjects.

"We're also horny teenagers," Brian laughs.

" _I'm_ a horny teenager!"

Brian laughs louder. Rosalind splashes him. He nudges her and she shoves him into the pool. He emerges from underwater and pushes his hair out of his face, spluttering water out of his mouth as Rosalind laughs at him. He glares at her and grabs hold of her ankles, pulling her into the water with him. Rosalind screams and squirms, but Brian is stronger than her efforts.

He drags her in and dunks her under before pulling her back to surface, a grin plastered across her face. She slaps his arm and splashes him continuously, yelling that he's an "absolute testicle" for submerging her.

Brian just laughs at her, batting his eyelashes and apologising sweetly. And, as always, he gets away with his antics.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> @RebeloftheDamned betad this for me bc shes fabulous, but if theres anything me or her have missed out, please feel free to let me know 
> 
> Title - Beautiful Dirty Rich - Lady Gaga - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7Nr33m1zXVE (thank you Ayesha)  
> Chapter Title - She's My Best Friend - Velvet Underground - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2adiYfv5rwA
> 
> Characters belong to themselves, all a work of fiction.


	5. 5. I Saw Red

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rosalind gets a text in her next lesson.
> 
> Brian:  
> "Suspended!✌"

Brian keeps a close eye on Rosalind's relationship with Parker. He does his best to watch from the sidelines, let Rosalind come to him in her own time about any issues, but he watches her back. Like a good friend should.

 

But the second he lets his guard down and gazes over his own relationship is when he gets a very badly timed phone call.

 

Brian is - quite frankly- between Harriet's legs when his phone starts ringing. Her head turns to glance at it, Brian quickly placing his hands either side of her face and tilting it back to face him. He kisses her, telling her to ignore it as he continues to fuck her.

 

The phone stops ringing for a couple of seconds. And then starts again.

 

Then stops.

 

Then starts.

 

Then stops.

 

Then starts.

 

Brian stops as the ringing does, sitting up to look at his phone, obviously annoyed.

 

"Who is it?" Harriet asks, watching as his eyes scan over the screen.

 

"Rosalind." He states, as his phone lights up once more with one of the silly selfies that Roz had taken and set as her caller ID.

 

Harriet orders him to answer it. Brian hesitates, "It might be important."

 

He does as he's told, answering with a casual, "Hey."

 

"Brian-Brian, I'm-.. I'm sorry I know Harriet's there but I just- I needed to-... I still need to-..." She talks faster than usual, hiccuping with her breaths.

 

"Whoa there, calm down, yeah? Good. Now, tell me what's wrong." Brian says calmly. His spare hand is idling over Harriet's hips. She bites her lip and her eyes watch his hand.

 

"Me and Parker, we're finished, I just-.. I'm walking from his and I need to come down, please.."

 

Brian presses his lips together and sighs softly, "How long?"

 

"Like 40 minutes, you can finish what you're doing. I'm sorry I interrupted..." she gushes.

 

"It's fine. Just let me know when you're near so I can meet you at the door."

 

They exchange goodbyes quickly and Brian hangs up, throwing his phone to the end of the bed. He rubs his face with both of his hands and grumbles that he hates drama.

 

Harriet sits up, trailing her fingers down Brian's chest gently to follow the grooves of his ribs. She places soft kisses against his neck. His hands return to her hips and they squeeze her.

 

He hums softly, "Y'know we have about 40 minutes left." Brian feels her smirk against his neck before she lies herself back down, pulling him with her, "Then show me a good time, Haner."

 

Brian meets Rosalind by the door. She hugs him tightly and hides her face in his shoulder, sniffling quietly. He rubs her back gently and holds her for a moment or two before pulling away, holding her by the shoulders, studying her tear stained face.

 

"Do you need anything?" he asks her. He can see their maid peer around the kitchen door frame in the corner of his eye, her face softening as she sees the state on Rosalind. Rosalind shakes her head.

 

He takes her upstairs, opening his bedroom door for her. Harriet is sat on her phone, scrolling through her twitter feed. She glances up and smiles at Rosalind, greeting her quietly. The room absolutely stinks of Brian's body spray, trying to mask the smell of sex.

 

To be fair on Brian and Harriet, they'd done pretty well to hide the fact that they'd fucked. They dressed themselves again, put the condom in the bathroom bin rather than Brian's bedside one, remade the bed and Harriet had redone her hair and makeup. They had, however, missed one little detail, that Rosalind immediately picks up on.

 

All three sets of eyes immediately fixate on this small, silver Durex packet as Rosalind starts to lower herself to sit on the bed. She stops mid squat and stares at it, standing back up again and whipping her head around to Brian.

 

"You were having sex?!" she yells. Brian closes his door quickly and struggles to find words. He watches as Harri's hand slowly creeps towards the foil, snatching it and throwing it away.

 

"I-... yeah. Yeah, we were..." he stammers.

 

"Over the covers or under?" she asks, folding her arms across her chest.

 

"That really isn't important-" Brian tries to brush it off.

 

"Answer me, Brian Elwin."

 

He chews his lip. Middle name usage means he could have his genitalia removed within the next 10 seconds if he doesn't answer. "...Over."

 

"I'm _not_ sitting down on that bed. Absolutely not. I love you guys but I am not sitting on whatever juices y'all produced."

 

Brian and Harriet exchange slightly guilty glances. Harriet is more amused than anything. Brian fetches a blanket, throwing it over the duvet, but Rosalind snatches it mid-air, wrapping herself up like a burrito and letting herself flop onto the bed.

 

Brian shrugs and sits down, totally used to her antics, but Harriet speaks up.

 

"What're you doing, Rose?" she asks, trying and failing to hide the amusement in her voice.

 

"Being a burrito of sadness, with extra why-the-fuck-did-this-happen-to-me sauce. It's a secret recipe." she replies.

 

Brian laughs, "why are you like this even when you're heartbroken?"

 

Harriet returns to her phone as Brian questions Rosalind on what happened. She explains that Parker had been cheating, that he told her to check a text that had come through- which he assumed was from his mother- and it turned out to be a sext from Ava.

 

"Ouch." Brian mumbles.

 

"I know, right? So I flipped the fuck out and went through the messages and he's been sending sexts and photos back and forth since _before_  we were together and he's just being a disgusting little poop bag so I finished it. And I don't wanna see his stupid face ever again."

 

There's a soft knock at the door, followed by the kindly face of the maid. She carefully steps in and places a tray of three hot chocolates on Brian's bedside table. He smiles at her and says a thanks as she excuses herself. Brian likes the maid, she does kind things without asking. He makes a mental note to slip her an extra $50 next time he sees her.

 

Brian looks out for Rosalind when they go back to school. He has to look after her, keep the posh prick away from her, keep her safe. He has to. He has a reputation now. To the point where people actually like him and people think he's kinda cool.

 

Rosalind managed to make it to Thursday without any hassle from Parker. He was standing and talking in a circle formation during their break in a corner of the cafeteria, near the entrance. He was watching the doors idly, watching who came through. Harriet tugs at his arm as Parker walks through, and Brian's shoulders immediately square up.

 

Rosalind hadn't noticed until he started drifting his way towards their circle.

 

"Rose," he greets, raising his eyebrows and smiling. He's stopped in front of her, and Rosalind has frozen.

 

Brian steps forward, "Don't talk to her."

 

"Excuse me?"

 

"I said, don't talk to her." He repeats himself firmly, jaw setting. Harriet carefully pulls Rosalind out of the way.

 

"Why shouldn't I? I have the right to, don't I?" Parker asks, stepping closer to Brian. They're almost chest to chest, both of them holding their defensive stance.

 

"Absolutely not. Not after the mess you made. Now, walk away."

 

Parker does as he's told slowly, looking Brian up and down slowly as he does so. He mutters under his breath.

 

Brian narrows his eyes, "What?"

 

"You wanna talk to me now, Haner?"

 

"What did you say to me?"

 

"I said your mother would be fucking ashamed of the mess that you are, Haner."

 

There's a moment when Brian is stood in front of Harriet and Rosalind, and a moment when he is not. By the time the moment he is not, it's too late, because Parker is already pinned to the ground with a bloody nose and, what Rosalind assumes will soon be two black eyes.

 

There are teachers dragging him off the other boy, but Brian kicks and struggles against them, giving up once Parker is also standing. His jaw is still set and the room is quiet as he and Parker get ordered - and escorted- to the principle's office.

Rosalind gets a text in her next lesson.

  
_Brian:_  
" _Suspended!_ ✌"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Title - Beautiful Dirty Rich - Lady Gaga - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7Nr33m1zXVE (thank you Ayesha)  
> Chapter Title - I Saw Red - Warrant - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3dh79Ggx9Js
> 
>  
> 
> Characters belong to themselves, all a work of fiction.


	6. 5.5 Suspended

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Brian laughs, "They are pissed.""

Rosalind sprints to Brian's after school.

 

"Suspended?! You got _suspended_?!" she yells when he opens the door.

 

Brian grins, "Hey Rosalind! Nice to see you too. No, I didn't get hurt in the fight in the Principle's office, totally fine, not like he winded me or anything-"

 

"Brian, you got _suspended_!"

 

"I'm well aware of that, Rose." He steps aside and she walks in, dumping her bag by the doorway and heading into the kitchen. He closes the door and follows her, "You don't live here, y'know."

 

"I know. I'm thirsty. I can't believe you're suspended..."

 

"I can. It's not exactly a hard thing to understand. I got in a fight- Well, two fights. Principle Whatshisface was like 'we cannot accept such behaviour here at Worthington's Preparatory Academy, therefore I am going to have to suspend you both from your studies for a week for you to suffer some sort of consequences', and here we fuckin' are."

 

Rosalind has made herself a glass of lemonade and chugs it, raising an eyebrow at Brian as she does so. She finishes the glass, places it on the counter before speaking.

 

"Who put a bee in your bonnet?"

 

"Parker did when he fucking started."

 

Rosalind spins the glass around in her hand before filling it up again, placing the bottle back in the fridge. Brian leans against the island counters.

 

"This is my fault, isn't it?" Rosalind asks, quietly.

 

Brian furrows his brows, "Don't be daft. It's his fault for being a cockwomble. He started, so I finished. I'm not having him upset you again. He's done enough."

 

"You don't have to look after me."

 

"I know I don't have to. I'm choosing to."

 

Rosalind's eyes wander around the kitchen. Brian offers her a cupcake, and she accepts, picking the casing off slowly and carefully. He moves to put an arm around her shoulders.

 

"Don't get upset, Roz. It's his loss. End of the day, I'm the one who came out on top, and he's not fucking you around."

 

Rosalind shrugs, "I don't know. I feel like I've just made things poopy for you and Joyce and Robert are probably mad at you-"

 

Brian laughs, "They are _pissed_."

 

Rosalind looks up at him and Brian smiles back. He suggests that they collect snacks in their arms, go upstairs and play video games.

 

So they do. Which results in Brian throwing empty cupcake wrappers, two hours later, at Rosalind as she dances around the room in victory from absolutely destroying him at Mario Kart.

 

But Brian has to admit that she's a total pro on Rainbow Road.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Short little fic related drabble c:
> 
> Title - Beautiful Dirty Rich - Lady Gaga - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7Nr33m1zXVE (thank you Ayesha)  
> Chapter Title - Matt Nathanson - Suspendedhttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IfaSazvefBw
> 
>  
> 
> Characters belong to themselves, all a work of fiction.


	7. 6. Next Year

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Because I can't think of anyone better to head into January with, y'know?"

The rest of the year flies by.

Brian and Rosalind celebrate birthdays together, passing exams and Parker moving schools. Soon, it's December and Brian isn't sure how to feel.

He's dreading Christmas, as it's the anniversary of his mothers death, but at the same time he's sort of looking forward to celebrating a year of a life changing friendship with Rosalind. They've planned to spend Christmas evening together, Rosalind being dropped at the Anderson household after spending time with her family.

He opens the door and Rosalind grins, yelling a "Merry Christmas!" as she excitedly holds up a bag with a very badly designed Santa on it. Brian smiles at her, returning the greeting and lets her in. Rosalind rambles about the ugly Santa bag as she follows him upstairs, saying that it was so badly done that it's almost cute- but also absolutely terrifying.

She skips into his bedroom, plonking the bag down in the middle of the bed, "There's something I've gotta give you first. It's not really a gift, but a sentiment," she pulls out a glass candle, holding it out to him as he closes the door.

He raises an eyebrow and takes it, turning it over in his hand. He stops breathing as he reads the words, ' _All that I am, or that I hope to be, I owe to my angel mother._ ' He smells it, the clean smell of patchouli assaulting his senses. Brian wanders to the bed, placing the candle on his bedside table and lights it. He mumbles a thank you.

Rosalind smiles and settles herself down, "It's okay. I saw it and thought it'd be nice, y'know? She deserves something, right?"

He sits next to her, resting his head on her shoulder, "Yeah. It's super thoughtful of you."

She nudges him, "Cheer up, Buttercup. It's Christmas!"

And so, they start opening presents. They exchange gifts. A few serious, a few jokey. Brian's last present was a packet of condoms. Rosalind nudges him with her elbow and winks, "For you and Harri. Don't be silly, wrap your willy!"

He fiddles with the box in his hands, "We, uh... We broke up, Rose."

  
She gasps, "And you didn't tell me?"

"I thought I did, I'm sorry. It's okay though, we just kinda lost interest. I'm gonna go to Paige's new years party and see if I can pull or something. Are you gonna go?"

She nods, "Probably. M'sorry, Bri."

"It's whatever. At least I have protection," he laughs. They chat about what they had for Christmas, Rosalinds eyes lighting up when he says he got a keyboard.

"Is it set up?" she asks eagerly. Brian nods, asking if she wants to jam. She practically launches herself off of his bed, "Lead the way, Haner!"

They spend the rest of the day in Brian's safe haven of a studio. Rosalind teaches him a little piano, showing him the basics. Once his attention span has moved on, they jam out and badly sing along to whatever the hell they're playing. Brian marks it as one of his favourite memories.

Soon, it's 11:55pm on New Years Eve. Brian is stood with a bottle of beer in his hand, leaning against the wall. Rosalind seemingly appears out of nowhere, snatching the drink from him and taking a sip. He smiles.

"Rosie!" He exclaims, pushing himself away from the wall.

"Don't call me that. Thanks." she says, handing him back the drink. He grins and finishes it, putting it on a conveniently placed side table, "How's your night been? Pulled?"

Brian scrunches his nose, "Nah. Everyone's too drunk. I rocked up late."

She laughs, "Yeah... I wasn't gonna come but then I heard that the new Swedish exchange kid was gonna be here and I wanted to know if he's hot or not. Spoiler: he's not."

"How shallow of you, Rosalind,"

"I'm rich, what do you expect?"

He flicks her, "Speaking of rich, you look nice," he takes in her red strapless bodycon dress and classy black heels. Her hair is voluminous and thick. He has to admit, she's the most beautiful person in the room. Her makeup flawless, the dark rouge of her lips and her smokey eyes captivate him.

She smiles at him, flipping her hair, "Why, thank you," she chirps, "You scrub up pretty nice yourself. I'm surprised you have jeans that _aren't_ ripped to shreds."

Somebody yells that there's one minute left. "Yeah, I thought I'd get an early start on my resolution of trying to not fall off my skateboards and ruin my jeans, y'know?"

"Very wise idea."

"I have those occasionally."

Countdown starts. There's someone asleep on the floor with an empty can in hand. Someone else is balancing solo cups on them. Brian overhears something along the lines of 'get ready to get your lipstick smudged'.

"I'm glad you came, Rose. And I'm glad you found me," Brian shouts above the noise of the countdown.

"Whys that?"

"Because I can't think of anyone better to head into January with, y'know?"

"You're drunk,"

"I'm not!"

"You so are!"

Five.

"I'm not. I just appriecate you."

Four.

"You are _wasted_!" she laughs.

Three.

"I've only had one drink, I swear."

Two.

"Okay sure."

One.

Some people are yelling and cheering. Others are chugging or making out. Brian isn't entirely sure what's come over him, but he's found himself holding Rosalind's waist, pulling her close and kissing her. As much as she doesn't seem to mind, eyes closed and kissing him back, she's incredibly confused. To be fair, so is Brian.

They pull away completely. Rosalind wipes the lipstick from his face and laughs.

"Happy New Year."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Title - Beautiful Dirty Rich - Lady Gaga - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7Nr33m1zXVE (thank you Ayesha)  
> Chapter Title - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j1qQuSuQaHY - Next Year - Foo Fighters
> 
> Characters belong to themselves, all a work of fiction.


	8. 7. She Hates Me

Brian and Rosalind don't talk about what happened New Years.

Brian pushes it from his thoughts. Rosalind, however, can't stop thinking about it. She runs over it in her mind. She can still feel his hands on her waist and his lips against hers. She can still see his smile afterwards and hear his short, slightly awkward laugh. She wants to just grab herself by the shoulders and shake some goddamn sense in.

"Brian why'd you kiss me?" Rosalind asks suddenly. She's tacking up Jessie, Brian leaning against the stall door.

His eyes widen, "Sorry?"

"You kissed me New Years. Like, what the fuck was that?"

Brian shrugs, "It seemed like a good idea at the time," he says.

Rosalind cranks up Jessie's girth, the mare pinning her ears and shifting her weight, "It's just-... it was outta nowhere and I wanna know if it meant something because I honestly can't stop thinking about it and its starting to drive me _insane_."

"I-... I don't know, Rose. It didn't mean anything it was just like-... a New Years kiss, y'know? Like you just-"

"Do it."

"Yeah."

"Okay," she pats Jessie and pulls down her stirrups. They make a loud cracking noise that echoes through the barn. Brian opens the stable door for her.

"Are you mad at me, Rose?" he asks, closing the door again after her and Jessie.

She snatches her hat up, placing it on her head and clipping it silently, mounting swiftly. Her movements are sharp and purposeful. Maybe even somewhat aggressive. She clicks and squeezes her horse on, Brian following sheepishly.

"Rosalind?"

"Yeah. I'm kinda mad." She replies curtly.

"For _kissing you_?"

"Yeah."

"Why?"

"'Cause you made me feel some feelings I haven't felt before during that kiss and you're telling me it was _just_  a New Years kiss?!"

Brian rubs the back of his neck as he stops at her outdoor arena. He shouts to her that he thinks he should leave. She calls back a 'whatever' as Jessie is pushed into trot. Brian goes home and sits in his room, thinking hard about what his next move is. Honestly, he's terrified of losing Rosalind and right now that's the only thing he can see happening. He never in his _entire life_ believed that a stupid New Years' kiss would get him in this situation.

All he can do is apologise and wait. He can't lie to her and say it meant something and that he's totally in love with her or something dumb. He can just apologise for being an utter dick and not thinking before doing. It takes her a day or two to get back to him, but she does. She too apologises for being 'unreasonably angry'.

She stays over that night. They hug it out and verse each other on Mario Kart to get any left over aggression out of their system. Rosalind plays as Princess Peach, and Brian is Bowzer. Brian reckons it's a representation of their personalities. Rosalind flips her hair over her shoulder, "Because I'm the prettiest princess," she laughs. Brian rolls his eyes and nudges her at the start of the race.

Brian wakes up the next morning to something tickling his nose. His eyes struggle open and he lazily rubs his nose. The itch doesn't leave. He focuses his vision and realises that it's a strand of Rosalind's long, ginger hair curling in a strange direction and taking its path directly up his right nostril. He strokes her hair down and closes his eyes again.

They don't stay closed for long.

His eyes suddenly shoot open and he stares down at Rosalind, curled up close to him with her head on his chest, rising and falling with his breathing. Her arm is slung over his stomach and she's drooling on his pajama shirt. He groans quietly.

This is _not_ what he wants.

He knows he'll just get himself in trouble if she wakes up and the two of them are all snuggled up together like puppies of the same litter. He carefully rolls her off of him and to the other side of his bed, tucking her in and placing a pillow between them for good measure. He turns his back on her and sighs, staring at the painted wood of his bedside table and listening to the silence of the dawn. He doesn't think he's ever been so glad that Rosalind is a heavy sleeper.

He hears her snore and shift, glancing over his shoulder to watch her snuggle up to the pillow, cuddling it tightly and sighing gently. He returns to stare at the bedside table.

It sort of reminds him of the first time they properly hung out, when Rosalind fell asleep on his shoulder on the sofa. He remembers feeling some sort of way about her, like she was going to be something special. Something important, even. He can't deny that she is. She is incredible, understanding and warm hearted. She's beautiful, a bit of a dork and a laugh. She's a Mary-Sue. Everything anyone could ever want.

Everything that he ever wants.

Brian forces himself to get up at this point. Lying in bed staring at nothing and thinking is doing him no good. He fetches himself a glass of water before dragging himself back into bed.

Rosalind is awake.

"Good morning," she says. She sounds sleepy, her eyes however are wide and alert. She's still cuddling the pillow.

"Morning," he replies, sipping from his glass and placing it on his Iron Maiden coaster before settling under the covers.

"Was this pillow here when we went to bed?" Rosalind asks quietly.

Brian nods, "yeah," he lies. Rosalind hums.

There's a moment of silence. The room is dim and the birds are singing outside. It's warm, but not too warm. Enough to be comfortable with one leg in and one leg out of the duvet.

"Brian?"

"That's me,"

"Can I have a cuddle?"

He raises an eyebrow and glances at her, "A cuddle?"

"Yeah. I wanna go back to sleep and a cuddle might help." He hesitates, "Please?"

He gestures with his arm and she's quick to settle beside him. He can feel her relax as she takes hold of his hand in her own and closes her eyes. It's not long before her breathing slows and settles and she's fast asleep again. Brian can feel his eyes slowly drooping.

The last thing he thinks before he falls asleep again is something along the lines of ' _This is gonna be one big fucking mess_.'

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Title - Beautiful Dirty Rich - Lady Gaga - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7Nr33m1zXVE (thank you Ayesha)  
> Chapter Title - She Hates Me - Puddle of Mudd - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BYE4CVhVkhw 
> 
> Characters belong to themselves, all a work of fiction.


	9. 8. Nearest Thing To Hip

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They both let their parents down.

Rosalind and Brian soar through to graduation. Rosalind gets most likely to succeed, Brian gets most likely to be a rockstar.

Rosalind finally passes her driving test and Brian's adopted parents finally trust him with a car.

They both let down their parents.

"Rosie, sweetheart, what do you _mean_  you're not going to college?" her mother asks, exasperated. Her father says nothing, trying to look supportive, but both Rose and Brian can see the disappointment in his eyes.

"I mean I'm not going to college. I wanna go get a normal person job, in a normal person suburb, in a normal person apartment," she replies, "I wanna try being not-rich."

Brian refuses to meet the shocked gaze of her mother. He just continues to make a fuss of Oscar, the oversized lap dog. The Anderson's are more than happy to let Brian live his normal person life. They are the least understanding people in the world yet they understand that he wasn't born into a life of wealth, and although he is grateful for everything they've done for him, he doesn't feel right living with money.

They eventually come to an agreement. Brian and Rosalind find a two bedroom apartment. It's industrial, yet modern, in the middle of Huntington. Not too far from anything. The Andersons' and the Evans' go halves on the deposit for their new accommodation, as well as giving them enough to pay for the first three months rent and food. Rosalind keeps her horses and her dogs with her parents, regularly visiting at least twice a week. Brian visits at least once a month.

They do not, however, waste time in going to find jobs.

They go around together, giving out résumé's wherever they can until they struck gold. There's a small, hipster-esque coffee/book/music store on the corner. Brian raises an eyebrow as he reads _'The Nearest Thing To Hip'_  before following Rosalind into the shop.

The second the door opens, the strong smell of coffee engulfs them. The inside is interesting, with bright yet muted colours and a worn wooden floor. The furnishing is mismatched and worn, but somehow trendy.

Rosalind approaches the counter with purpose. Brian trails after her, taking in the surroundings of the building. He feels calm.

"Hi, I'm Rosalind and this is Brian, I was wondering if I could speak to the manager or owner?" she speaks with confidence.

A silver haired man in a denim jacket turns, shooing away the boy at the till and leans across the counter to her. His face is well structured and thin, his frame is almost frail but his posture is strong.

"Name's Chris, I own the place. How can I help you, darlin'?" he asks as Brian finally joins Rosalind at the desk. She shoots him a quick glare. He smirks back.

"We were wondering if there were any positions available at your business. We've just moved out and into an apartment in the city and we're looking for jobs-"

Brian interrupts her, "I-, sorry, Rose, I gotta question. This-... this shop, is it named after a Waterboys song?"

Chris' face lights up, "You're hired. Both of you."

Brian laughs, "So it is?"

Rosalind stands, her mouth agape, shocked, "You-...You don't wanna see our résumé's or anything?"

He shakes his head, handing them a notepad, "No, my dear. Write your details down, you can start tomorrow. You, my boy, are in the record section. Rosalind, was it? Very pretty name. You're in the café. I expect you here tomorrow, 9am and we'll get you all trained up."

Rosalind and Brian are practically bouncing. They seemed to have hit the jackpot, working in the same building, for the same person, for decent wage. Their shifts, it turns out, aren't too far off each other. They carpool to work, either one of them waiting around for an hour before or after their shifts.

Brian lives his city life well. He's out every weekend, meeting and bringing home girls regularly- much to Rosalind's distaste- and dating occasionally. He's made friends with a few of the local customers of similar age and a few of the regular lads at the bars.

Rosalind enjoys her city life in a quieter way. She goes out clubbing occasionally, letting guys pay for her drinks and that's all. She mostly keeps herself to herself. She hasn't really considered a relationship since her fiasco with Parker when she was still in high school. She gets a lot of casual flirting, being the cute coffee girl. Chris says she's been great for sales. She thinks he's joking, but he isn't.

Today, she's being persistently chatted up by a rather attractive customer and for once she's giving in to it. Also, today, Brian has been let off early due to doing four hours overtime.

He slips in behind the flirt, patting his hand on the counter, "hey, Rosie, sorry to interrupt but I wanna know if you want the keys to the car or if you want me to come get you?"

"Is this your boyfriend?"

Rosalind laughs, shooting daggers at Brian in a split second, "no, he's my roommate. He works here and we carpool. Brian, this is Nate-"

"Okay, cool, hi Nate, do you want _the keys to the car, Rosalind?_ " Brian persists.

"Rosalind!" Nate exclaims, "That is such a beautiful name, where does it come from?"

"I think it's Latin-" she replies, before being cut off again,

"Rosalind, for fucks sake, _do you want me to pick you up?_ "

She smiles at him sweetly, "Yes please, Brian. There's no need to take that tone with me."

Brian has to take a slow, deep breath. He controls his frustration. "Okay, I'll be back at five to come get you then, yeah? I'll wait outside for you. Could you be a babe and bring me a coffee when you finish too, please?"

Nate doesn't give her a chance to so much as think about answering, "You finish at five, huh?"

Brian rolls his eyes. He's one hundred and ten percent ready to backhand this guy into a whole other dimension, "Yeah she does, but today I'm coming to get her, _as we just arranged_ , so you're more than welcome to exchange numbers and meet up another time, okay? Awesome. So Rose, coffee later, please? Stick it on my tab?"

It's Nate's turn to narrow his eyes. Rosalind just smiles and nods at him, "Of course, Brian."

"Rad! I'm gonna go see if I can catch up with someone so I can finally say goodbye to you. Nice meeting you Nate or whatever your name was." Brian's almost gone by the end of his sentence. There is absolutely no point in Nate continuing to grumble, _yeah, it's Nate_.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Title - Beautiful Dirty Rich - Lady Gaga - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7Nr33m1zXVE (thank you Ayesha)  
> Chapter Title - Nearest Thing To Hip - The Waterboys - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MDqVBKp5BfQ (I fuckin' love this band)
> 
> Characters belong to themselves, all a work of fiction.


	10. 9.Frigid B*tch

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Poor guy didn't even last five minutes."

Rosalind is stressed.

It's 6.30 on a Saturday and she's running around their apartment in a dressing gown and a turban towel like a headless chicken.

"Oh my _God_ Brian, what am I doing?" she whines as she paces back into her room.

Brian rolls his eyes, throwing another pretzel into his mouth, "Going on a date."

"No, but-... what am I doing?"

Brian peers over the back of the sofa, "Rosie, _calm down_  for fucks sake. You're just going for dinner."

"With a guy whose number I got over the counter at work!"

"You make it sound like you're a prostitute. You got good rates? How much for a BJ?"

She smacks the back of his head, "Fuck off."

He laughs and tells her to go get ready, which sends her into a further downward spiral of stress. Brian tries to continue his _Fast and Furious_  marathon and ignore her, but that isn't possible.

"Do I wear this dress or _this_ dress?"

"How much make-up do I put on? Like a lot or go more- y'know-, natural?"

"Brian, do you think I should wear tights?"

"Heels? And if yes, like, heeled boots or pumps?"

"Do I wear my hair up or down? Should I curl it or-"

Brian sighs heavily, "Rosalind, breathe."

She's stood in front of him with a stunning dusty pink off-the-shoulder midi dress, with one heeled boot on and one shiny black stiletto pump, half her hair up and half down and three quarters of an eyebrow penciled in. Not to mention she has both of the opposite pair of shoes in each hand and a black pair of tights tucked under her pinkie. She takes a deep breath and lets it out slowly.

"Better?"

"Yeah... Okay, but which shoes?"

8PM rolls around and Brian could not wait to see the back of Rosalind, happily shooing her and Nate out of the apartment, closing the door after hearing her click-clack down the stairs in her stilettos and punching the air and yelling a _yes!_  to himself. He has never been so happy to see Rosalind leave the flat in their entire time living here, none the less with a strange man whom neither of them know anything about apart from his name.

He does, however, love having the place to himself. No-one around to tell him to get his "nasty little feeties" off of the sofa or telling him that his films are boring and that they need to watch something they both want to watch. No we-may-as-well-be-an-old-married-couple bickering.

Brian hears familiar voices on the stairs, hearing Rosalind's laugh and the rhythmic click-clack of her heels and feels the need to quickly evacuate the living area. He clicks the TV off and quietly jogs to his room, flicking the lights off as he goes. He can hear Rosalind unlocking the door and inviting Nate in.

He quietly hums to himself, wandering to his bed and sprawling across it, scrolling his way through Facebook. About an hour somehow slips past him and he's managed to worm his way under his covers and snort laugh at someone's Snapchat story before he realises that he's hearing two pairs of feet shuffle into Rosalind's bedroom. He listens quietly, trying his very best not to feel like a pervert.

He has to admit, he's shocked.

Rosalind hasn't even thought about sleeping with anyone since she's moved, never mind sleeping with someone on the first date. _She's still a virgin for fucks sake,_  he thinks, chewing his lip and his fingers idly tapping the back of his phone case. He doesn't hear much movement, but hushed conversation which he can't understand. He waits.

And he waits.

And, he waits.

It's been about half an hour and conversation has stopped. He shrugs and puts his phone on charge, muttering to himself.

"Poor guy didn't even last five minutes."

~

Brian sits at the breakfast bar, catching up on morning Snapchat, posting a photo of his Lucky Charms and black coffee, with the caption _'#adulting'_. He hums quietly to himself as he posts it and continues to eat. His crunching drowns out the sound of footsteps and the creaking of the old hinges.

"Good morning." Rosalind says, quietly. Her arms are wrapped around her waist as she tip-toes through the living room to the kitchen and turns the coffee maker on.

Brian jumps slightly, "Morning, love machine."

"Love machine?" she raises an eyebrow and hesitates as she takes two mugs out of the cupboard.

"I heard you and Nate last night," Rosalind freezes, "Poor fucker, I know 13 year old's who can last longer."

"It wasn't like that, Brian," she says quietly, putting coffee into the bottom of each mug.

Brian puts his phone down and turns around on the stool to face her, "So he was just quiet?"

She turns and slaps his arm, quick and sharp, "Shut your mouth."

Brian laughs and rubs his arm, "Rose, chill out, I'm just-"

"We didn't fuck. Nate was a gentleman, thank you very much." she hisses.

His eyebrow raises, flickering his gaze to the cracked open doorway and whispers, "then why is he asleep in your bed, hm?"

Rosalind aggressively snatches the coffee pot from the machine and pours. He's not sure if the steam surrounding her is from her anger or the pot.

"Rosalind, it's okay to-"

"I wussed out."

"What?"

"I said no, Brian. The poor guy had his pants off and I said _no_. I was a frigid bitch."

Brian huffs out a laugh. Rosalind glares over her shoulder as she adds milk to the mugs.

"Listen, Rosie, there isn't anything wrong with that. You gotta take your time with these things-"

"You were 15. I'm almost 20."

"So? Who cares? I don't care. Nate probably doesn't care. He clearly cares enough to be polite and accept that you said no. Besides, mine was illegal and most definitely something I'd rather not think about. Yours will be legal and hopefully, a nice thing."

She stirs the coffee quietly and hums. They both jump violently when Nate clears his throat behind them. He asks where the toilet is and both of them point numbly towards the bathroom door. Nate looks between them nervously and shuffles his way in, muttering a thank you and gesturing.

Rosalind and Brian look at each other after hearing the click of the lock.

Rosalind whispers, "How long was he stood there?" Brian shrugs, "I put a pillow between us while we slept. He didn't even get that close."

Brian laughs, "You do you, Rosie."

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Title - Beautiful Dirty Rich - Lady Gaga - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7Nr33m1zXVE (thank you Ayesha)
> 
> Chapter Title - Frigid Bitch - Anacrusis - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cyj3VWhAQdc
> 
> Characters belong to themselves, all a work of fiction.


	11. 10. Girl All The Bad Guys Want

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Rosalind shoves Brian's shoulder, "You brought me to a biker bar?!""

Brian is scrolling down his twitter feed slowly, slumped down in the sofa with his feet propped on the very edge of the coffee table. Rosalind is scrolling through the movies selection on their TV.

Both of them have worked all week, it's been three weeks since they've spent any time together properly, and slumped on the sofa in their pajamas on a Saturday night seems as rich as it's going to get. Rosalind has been spending her odd hours off with Nate, whilst Brian has been putting extra shifts and putting nose to the grindstone to get a raise and a PA system so he can put in a gig or two.

"...We could watch _Grease_ again?" Rosalind suggests, reaching the end of the films list. Brian groans, "Or like... _Grease Live_. It's different 'cause it's live."

Brian looks at her, "Oh, tell me more. Tell me more."

She throws the remote onto his stomach, "You find something then, asshole."

He grins and scrolls switches to Facebook instead. He's barely opened the app when he gasps, "There's a _Metallica_  cover band playing in The Old Mill, we should _absolutely_  go."

He can feel her roll her eyes, "we've never been there though,"

"So? It's a _Metallica_  cover band,"

"Which one is _Metallica_  again?"

Brian jumps up and runs to his room, snatching up a guitar and jogging back, propping a leg up to rest his acoustic on his thigh as he plays the intro riff to _Enter Sandman_. Rosalind hums for a moment, bobbing her head to the riff before standing and dragging her feet across the floor as she heads to her room.

"I'll be like, half an hour."

Rosalind follows Brian closely as they walk into The Old Mill. It smells like old carpet and beer stained wood and it makes her feel uncomfortable. She feels as though her skirt is too short to be in this venue and if she didn't enter the room with Brian she'd be pounced on immediately. She whispers aggressively, "You didn't tell me this was a dive."

Brian shrugs. He fits right in with his messy hair, worn leather jacket and ripped jeans. She tells him that she feels like she's wasted a nice pair of eyelashes and he rolls his eyes, leaning on the bar and telling her, "lighten up, Rosie."

He orders them drinks and Rosalind perches herself on a bar stool. He leans his back against the bar as he sips, and the band start. Brian is thoroughly enjoying himself, singing along, drinking his beer, wiggling his shoulders and bobbing his head. Rosalind, a little less so, but still tapping a foot along as she texts and sips. About four songs in, there's a loud roar and rip of engines from outside of the bar. Brian raises an eyebrow and leans over to the bartender.

"Is this a biker spot? Or are they here for the band?" he asks. Rosalind's eyes widen.

"Biker bar," she responds.

Rosalind shoves Brian's shoulder, "You brought me to a biker bar?!"

He laughs and shrugs, "I didn't know. I'm sorry. Maybe you are dressed a little inappropriately for this crowd."

She slumps back and sips her vodka double and coke though a straw before telling him to buy her another drink. He just does as he's told, idly watching rough looking group of men and women filter in. In a stereotypical tattoo font, "Grey Thorn Reapers" is embroidered on the back of their heavy leather jackets. They keep to themselves, eyeing over the crowd the band have dragged in, a few of them spending too long loitering their gaze over Rosalind's legs. He squares his shoulders and inches towards her protectively.

Intermission rolls around. Rosalind is borderline drunk, trying to drown herself in vodka to avoid the fact she keeps getting winked at by a dirty old man in a bikers cut. The band quickly swarm the bar and get their drinks in.

"I've never seen you here before," a soft yet confident voice hits Brian's ears and he turns quickly to face it. His jaw almost hits the floor. A woman in a low cut tank top, a leather cut with a "vice president" badge sewn above the right breast pocket and low rise ripped jeans smiles sultry at him. She has thick winged liner, red lips and a beauty mark under her right eye. Everything about her, her eyes, her hair, her eyebrows, even the bandana wrapped around her wrist is dark apart from her complexion.

Brian, wiping the drool from his lip, has to reply as calmly as possible, "I heard there was a band playing. Thought I'd come for a drink n' check them out, y'know?"

"Yeah, I know. They're alright, huh? I'm Morgan, Morgan Alexandra."

"Brian Haner," he offers his hand for her to shake, which she takes, her grip firm and Brian raises an eyebrow at her slightly. There's a hand on his shoulder.

"Nate's outside, I can't stay here any longer, m'like, so sorry-" Rosalind blurts, clinging closely to his back as she checks around her, making sure she has her belongings, "I just- I can't. I'm too uncomfortable, I'm a delicate, drunk flower Brian I absolutely cannot stay around these hooligans."

He places a hand at her waist, "Are you gonna be okay to get out?"

"Yeah, I'll run. I've got my keys, Nate'll stay. Enjoy the rest of your night!" she is half talking to him, half to herself as she finds herself wobbling away from him. Her steps are sure and fast, but her shoulders and arms betray her balance.

Morgan raises a sharply penciled eyebrow, leaning with her elbow on the bar, "Is that your girlfriend?" she asks, her lips slightly pouted.

Brian laughs slightly and shakes his head, "No, she's my roommate. We've been friends for years, Nate's her boyfriend, he's just come to get her."

Morgan stands up straight and smirks, "Great. That means you can buy me a drink, can't you?"

And he does. Brian finds himself completely and utterly lost in this girl. Buying her drinks, dancing with her, his hands on her waist and lips on her neck, jaw and ear. He shares a cigarette with her outside, finding out that her uncle founded the motorcycle group and she's been hooked on them ever since, an honorary member since she was young. He discovers that she'd moved out of California for university before dropping out and returning, and shes now serving beers at her local bar. It gets her by.

He brings her back to the apartment, trying to be as quiet as possible which - much to Rosalind's distaste - isn't all that quiet when you're drunk. They're laughing and talking, doors closing loudly, shoes being taken off and dropped carelessly to the floor with a loud and heavy _thud_. The only time they're quiet is when their mouths are busy and even then they aren't all that quiet.

Rosalind is hating the fact that her hangover has kicked in early. She tries to hide herself in Nate's chest, muttering bitterly to herself about Brian's antics. She was thinking it couldn't get much worse until she hears:

"Not here,"

"Why not?"

"'Cause if I get cum on the sofa I'll be made to lick it the fuck off,"

"That's kinky. You're not into that?"

"Well, not my own,"

Shortly followed by Brian's bedroom door closing. Apparently, it's not only Rosalind's head that's pounding tonight.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Title - Beautiful Dirty Rich - Lady Gaga - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7Nr33m1zXVE (thank you Ayesha)  
> Chapter Title - Girl All The Bad Guys Want - Bowling For Soup - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VGRxmYXi4Io
> 
> Characters belong to themselves, all a work of fiction.
> 
> HAPPY NEW YEAR, ASSHOLES.


	12. 11. Stacy's Mom

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ""Psst," Brian whispers, "Joe, man, your daughter's one tough bird.""

Brian drums his fingers against the steering wheel as he pulls out of the Starbucks drive-thru. Rosalind sips at her Caramel Brulée Frappuccino and rolls her window down.  
  


"So are we gonna talk or what?" Rosalind asks, peering over the top of her mint Ray-Ban sunglasses to look at him. They're on their way to Rosalind's parents for lunch and so Rosalind can ride her horses. Brian had only found out his parents were invited as they stepped into the car.  
  


"Talk away, Rosie." he replies, resting his elbow on the lip of the door at the window.  
  


"Conversation is a two way thing, y'know. You have to talk back," she says. Brian shrugs in reply, "You've been quiet. You are not quiet in any way. You're not quiet when you work, when you eat, when you sleep, when you sit and relax, when you pee and thanks to the paper thin walls of our apartment, I know that you sure as hell aren't quiet when you fuck-"  
  


Brian laughs, "Okay, okay. I'll talk."

  
"Good. I'm hoping it'll be nothing like how you talked to that biker girl last week."

  
"Rosalind-"

  
"Who is she, anyway?"

  
"She's just a friend."

  
"A friend?"

  
Brian shrugs, "Yeah. A friend."

  
"Friends don't call friends-"

  
"Don't you fucking _dare_  say it, Rosalind."

  
She laughs, "Are you seeing her?"

  
They stop at a light and Brian quickly wriggles his way out of his studded leather jacket, "Sorta. We went to IHOP the other day and I'm taking her out this weekend."

  
"Wow, IHOP huh? Sounds official. I'm gonna tell your parents." she laughs.

  
"You are _not_  telling Joyce and Robert. They'll have a Goddamn heart attack,"

  
"I'm sure Bobbie would love to meet her,"

  
Brian shoots her side eye, "It's bad enough seeing them as it is."

  
As soon as he said it, he regretted it. The words left his mouth and he knew that he was going to get a lecture. And that he did.  
  
  
"What? Brian, they took you into their stately home and you're being ungrateful about it? I cannot believe you. I really cannot. We wouldn't have met each other if it weren't for them, they loved you and fed you and cared for you and would you _please_  stop taking the piss out of me?!"

  
"Do Ana and Joe know about Nate?" Brian asks. Rosalind averts her eyes, "Exactly."

  
Lunch is slightly awkward. Rosalind's mother talks about her recent boob job and Brian can't stop looking. When he does finally find where her face is, she's hotter than he remembers. Rosalind kicks him sharp in the shin after he winks and throws in a smooth "Thank you, Anastasia," as she places his plate in front of him.

  
The Anderson's find themselves quickly slipping away after the meal is over, giving a stiff hug and a handshake to Brian before heading out of the door with Anastasia Evans. He sighs heavily and slumps back in the dining chair once they've left the room. Rosalind's father, Joseph, laughs.

  
"That hard, hey son?" he asks, popping his after-dinner mint into his mouth.

  
Brian shakes his head, "you have _no_ idea."

  
Rosalind rolls her eyes, "Speaking of difficult family, have you spoken to Oli?"

  
Brian raises an eyebrow. He's surprised to hear Rosalind talk about her brother since he moved to live with their English family almost as soon as he was allowed out of the house. He supposes she's been hunting him down on Facebook and considering trying to make amends. All he has ever heard from her about her brother is how much he detested America after moving to the United Kingdom.

  
Joseph nods, "We're thinking about going to see him. He's in Devon with Granny Mags, taken over her farm since George died and she hasn't got the strength in her to do it anymore. Fancy joining us?"

  
Rosalind nods eagerly, "I _love_  farms. Oh, Brian, we can help with the pigs and the cows and-"

  
He interrupts her, "Slow down, cowgirl. Me? He's your family, Rose."

  
"You are family, Brian. Ever since you swore at me that Christmas you came for dinner, " Joseph laughs. Brian flushes pink and mutters sheepishly that he's still sorry about that, "You're more than welcome to join us, the two of you, if we do decide to go."

  
Rosalind nudges Brian in the ribs, "and you might be able to find yourself a real woman who wants to get _down in the mud_."

  
He looks at her, face blank but eyes judging. She snort laughs and slaps his thigh, making him raise an eyebrow and leans his elbow on the table, "If you were a guy I'd knock you the fuck out."

  
Brian's kind of glad to be out of the confines of Rosalind's family home as he follows her down to the stables. She's skipping and singing as she goes, her boots making a strange, almost echo-y sort of sound against concrete yard. He knows she's opened the door to the barn when he hears her squeal, "ponies!"

  
He waits for her down by their arena, texting idly. He's surprised when a hat gets placed on top of his head.

  
"C'mon," Rosalind says, impatiently. Her eyes are glistening and a wicked smile has formed across her pale lips.

  
"What?"

  
"What what? That hat should be your size. And you're the same size shoe as my dad so-"

  
"If you think I'm getting on a horse you're insane."

  
Rosalind tuts, "C'mon, Brian. It's only Garlic! He likes you."

  
"It's still a horse."

  
"He's a cute horse?"

  
Brian rolls his eyes and Rosalind pouts. She whines his name and slumps her shoulders forward, stamping a foot on the ground. He shakes his head and she nods hers, "Pleeeeease get on the horse. It'll be fun!"

  
"How do you know that? How do you know that I'm not gonna fall and break my neck and _die_? I could literally die Rosalind. You'll be paying for my funeral and if you don't serve red velvet cupcakes at the wake you can fuckin' bet I'm going to haunt your ginger ass."  
  


She grabs him by the hand and hauls him off of the bench, dragging him to the barn.

  
"We are gonna go on a nice little trail ride together, Brian. You're gonna wear my dad's riding boots, you're gonna get on Garlic- who is safe as a house- and I will have you on the end of a rope. Okay?"

  
Brian hates when she does this, purely because he knows that if he disagrees she'll lecture him on 'not doing things that push his comfort zone' and she'll probably make sly digs at him for the rest of the week. So, he caves.

  
"Fine. I'll get on your damn horse."

  
Joseph grins as they enter the barn. He's holding both horses and he offers Jessie's reins out to Rosalind. Brian scowls the entire time from when he's walked in to when he stands by the horse. He's given a leg up and Joe helps him with his stirrups, girth, general position and how to hold his reins before clipping a lead rope onto Garlic's bit.

  
"Psst," Brian whispers, "Joe, man, your daughter's one tough bird."

  
He smiles slowly, "you're only now figuring that out?"

  
Rosalind is riding circles around Brian, one foot in her stirrup whilst she adjusts the strap of her martingale. He doesn't like how impatient Jessie looks in comparison to Garlic, who is stood with his head dropped and relaxed, one ear locked on Brian and the other flickering around to follow sounds of the barn.

  
Once they get out of the grounds of the house, her horse calms down. She has one hand on her reins and the other on the leadrope that Garlic is attached to. Brian, however, still looks like he's fearing for his life. He has one hand white-knuckle gripped onto the saddle and the other on the reins.

  
He tries to stay calm by looking around at the woodsy area around them, but honestly, he doesn't know who he's trying to fool. He is however extremely impressed with how much Garlic doesn't seem to care about his nerves. He just continues plodding onward, matching the pace of the mare next to him.

  
"This is actually kind of nice," Brian says, glancing over at Rosalind. She smiles wide and meets his eyes.  


"I told you."

  
"I knew I would regret saying it,"

  
She laughs. They talk about everything and nothing on their ride. Brian even risks a little trot on the way home. She tells him she's proud of him, making him retaliate with a fond "get fucked". Once back at the barn, she teaches him how to dismount, untack and properly brush off. He doesn't mind learning with Rosalind, but at the same time, he's pretty sure he will _never_  want to do it again.

  
Brian thought that the drive home would be as quiet as most of their other journey's have been today, however, Rosalind noticed the way he squeezed her mother's waist and kissed her cheek goodbye.

 

"You _have_  to stop flirting with my mother!" she exclaims, as soon as both of their doors are closed. Brian hides a smile and puts the car into reverse.

  
"I have no idea what you're talking about."

  
Rosalind rolls her eyes, "I have known you for long enough and seen you hook up with enough of my friends to know when you're flirting,"

  
"I've been flirting with you for years and you never noticed,"  


"Bullshit. And stop it, it's my mom not me,"

  
Brian laughs, "Roz, I would _never_ flirt with your mom-"

  
She stares at him. He doesn't look.  


"Brian."  


"Rosalind."  


"You're an asshole," she imitates his voice, " _Thank you Anastasia, your boobs look so natural, I love how you cooked these potatoes, sit on my face Anastasia,_ "  


Brian laughs, "I did _not_ tell your mom to sit on my face. Your dad was right there."  


"So you were flirting!"

  
"It's not my fault she's hot. I've had a Stacy's Mom complex with that woman since I met you."

  
Rosalind slumps in her seat, folds her arms with a huff and scrunches her nose up.

  
"You are disgusting."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Title - Beautiful Dirty Rich - Lady Gaga - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7Nr33m1zXVE (thank you Ayesha)  
> Chapter Title - Stacy's Mom - Fountains of Wayne - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dZLfasMPOU4 
> 
> Characters belong to themselves, all a work of fiction.

**Author's Note:**

> Title - Beautiful Dirty Rich - Lady Gaga - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7Nr33m1zXVE (thank you Ayesha)  
> Chapter Title - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xkHdD3KzdpI Xmas Sux - Frank Iero  
> Rosalind (You Married The Wrong Guy) - The Waterboys - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QCGnVY5yhwg
> 
>  
> 
> Characters belong to themselves, all a work of fiction.


End file.
